Deceit [การหลอกลวง] (gaan Laawk Luaang) - The end (part 1)

Hi everybody. I hope that you all enjoyed your Chinese New Year holidays. Well, the story got to come to an end soon. And I have posted here part 7 which is also the end of the story but it would be split into two parts. I hope you enjoy the story.

The story comes to a conclusion........


As I saw the band come in, I could not help exclaiming, “I cannot believe you are in this band!”

“Hi, it’s such a coincidence, I am so glad to meet you,” Keith’s nonchalant tone familiar to my ears made me ecstatic this time round.

As we were introduced to the other band members, we soon worked with our rehearsals.

“I got for you your favourite sandwich and your drink,” Keith sat beside me as we took a short break.

“You still remembered what I like after such a long time. I guessed we have not met or talked to each other for several months,” I felt awkward as my initial excitement on seeing him died off quickly. I did not know what else to say to him as we had not spoken to each other for quite some time.

“I wanted to call you, but I guessed you must be busy. I did not want to disturb you. I could see that you have changed a lot and you put all those past unhappy events at the back of your head,” Keith was straightforward as his words somehow made me think of the remnants of the past.

“I would rather not talk about it. But thanks for everything back then,” my awkwardness raised a notch or two as I did not want the past to mingle inside me again.

“I really missed you a lot, Tassa. I could not confirm my feelings when we were constantly together at work, but once you left us, I felt that a piece of me has been broken away from me. I have been thinking about you but yet I do not have the courage to tell you back then as I was very guilty about covering up the incident. I felt I let you down….”he stopped abruptly as I raised my hand.

“Sorry, I am seeing someone else,” I could not believe that I said such a thing.

“Tassa, as long as you are happy with that person, I would be happy for you. But tell me the truth, do you like or even miss me even a bit?” Keith’s inquisitive probe was something which made me think for a while.

“No, not at all,” I breathed heavily as I answered the question not knowing why I lied to him.

I got up as I finished my drink and went to the washroom, not even telling him where I was going.

As I washed up, I looked at the mirror. My reflections of my thoughts were on the other side of the mirror as I seemed to be scrutinizing them on that other side.

Why should I lie to him? In fact, I missed him a lot and I liked him the most. I did not know why I said such a thing to him. I felt I was worse than Mr. Thaphorn. He might have deceived me but he was true to himself. I not only deceived Keith about how I felt but I had deceived myself too. As I touched up on my make-up, I breathed hard and closed my eyes as I tried to put aside all distractions and concentrate on my rehearsals.

As we went about the rehearsals, it was good to relive the old times where I would peek glances at Keith and performed. His smile to me was consistent as it would somehow reduce the stress that I had been going through.

As time passed very fast, it was three days before the competition.

“I would like to thank all of your support for me all these while. You all have been great. I would need to take a break for the competition and I have to thank most of you who would be supporting me in this competition,” I concluded my performance with a few words to the customers.

As I stepped down, Mr. Ng approached me again.

“Good luck to your performance. I hope you would win and I would be there to support you,” Mr. Ng smiled at me as he shook my hands.

“Thank you very much, I got to go now,” I was deliberate in trying to avoid him.

“Why are you avoiding me?” Mr. Ng’s question seemed to annoy me.

“I am not avoiding you, I am very busy these few days. I got to wake up early for my final rehearsals,” I told Mr. Ng firmly.

As the big day came, I felt as if there were butterflies fluttering around in my stomach as my heart beat went up a notch or two. As I saw my regular customers from my workplace coming in full force, I felt an unknown strength and to add to that foundation of strength, Keith was beside me.

As I sang the newly composed song by one of the songwriters in the record company, it was simply the most suitable song for me. It was entitled “My home”. It was about a person who missed home and who had been away from home and looking forward to coming home. To make it more challenging, half of the lyrics were in Thai and the other half in English. I felt that more of my inner feelings could be injected into the songs when I sang some of it in Thai. It was a gamble to whether the crowd was able to accept such a song.

“I would like to announce the top 3 who would have to sing another 2 songs before the winner is decided. The results are based on the marks given by this panel of 8 judges who are professional singers, producers and songwriters,” Miss Chut announced as she looked nervous herself.

My eyes were the widest as I was shivering as she announced the names. The first two names were not mine as I felt that my mood was brought up and down like a roller-coaster. As Miss Chut was about to announce, I felt prepared to break down and cry if my name was not announced.

“Tassa Songhrasri,” Miss Chut announced the last name.

I was ecstatic beyond words as I tried to balance myself after realizing that my name was announced. I was not aware of the roaring cheers from the crowd at the right hand side where all my supporters were there.

During the five minute break, I was at the backstage.

“You have made it to the top three,” Keith beamed with a smile as he handed me my favourite drink.

“I wish you good luck for the final stage of the competition,” Keith’s tone never changed ever since the first day I met him, but I know he meant well deep inside me.

As I sang two songs, the first song was a dance hit as my feelings and emotions were happy. As I danced around in those familiar steps that I used to do in the workplace, I felt as if I was performing as usual in the workplace blocking out the pressure of more than five hundred people staring at my direction. Keith complemented me well as we were familiar with each other’s style. An ace card that I had that the other singers did not have. I felt as if the stage was a playground where I moved around happily where the only boundaries were the stage perimeters. As I thought about the happy moments with Keith, Mr. Ng etc, I was smiling while singing the dance hit.

As the three of us rotated, I was trying to put myself into the right set of the feelings for the second song. It was a sad song as I recalled the demise of my father and how Mr. Thaphorn deceived me to be his mistress.

“Hello Tassa, someone who claims she knows you very well, wants to see you, but you only have 5 minutes before you have to go up to the stage,” a backstage crew shouted at my direction

As I looked up the mirror to see the reflection, I could not believe it. I dropped the make-up set as I turned around.

“Mama!” I shouted so loudly that the people outside the small make-up room might hear.

“I was seeing you perform on stages. You have grown up, my sweetheart. You are ready to take on the world to be a top-class performer. I am proud for you as you have already achieved so much,” her words were in between tears as we hugged each other tightly.

“How did you get here?” I was curious.

“Mr. Thaphorn arranged to let me come here to see your performance. He is a very nice man,” she spoke in a quaky voice as he coughs made her voice less audible.

“Mama, are you ok?” I was concerned as her face was abit pale

She nodded.

“Tassa, you have two minutes more!” a voice from the other side of the door shouted.

“Mama, go back to your sea to rest, ok? I need to perform soon,” I led my mother to the door.

As I re-appeared, I put on a solemn look as I sang the second and last song. Memories of my childhood flooded in my mind as I scrutinised the crowd for my mother. I saw my mother near the far left corner as I smiled at her faintly. As the memories meandered around, the demise of my father was very painful to me. As I sang the song, I looked at Keith and Keith nodded as if understanding what I felt. I felt a gush of negative feelings and emotions up to my eyes as I tried my best to hold back my tears as my eyes began to be watery. As I concluded the song, no matter how I shut out my tears, a tear seemed to ooze out from my left eye as I waved to the audience and went back to the backstage.

As I was out of the sight from the audience, I cried as hard as I could, leaving the backstage crew baffled to what had happened. I slumped on the chair so hard that it could have broken even though I was quite light. I looked at the mirror as the reflection showed a horrible-looking me. Ever since I came here, I felt I was a toy, a chess-piece. My main aim was to make as much as money in Singapore so that I could go back to my village and live a comfortable life for the rest of my life with my family but it was at the expense of my happiness. It was unthinkable that I would betray my own body to do such a thing, to give myself away to men with loads of money and not to a man I love.

“Tassa, I know I am not supposed to come in, but this is the least I can do for you,” Keith’s voice seemed to appear from all of a sudden as it jolted me out of my deep thoughts. I saw a bottle of my favourite drink in my sight literally even though I did not even turn my head.

“Tassa, no matter what happened to you in the past, I still believed your heart is good. You are a good woman. You decided what you had to do at that time because you felt that it was the right choice, but you did it against your wishes. It is fate that brought us back together. I want to get more involved in your life, not just the songs that you sing together with me,” Keith seemed to have summarised what he felt about me all these while.

I smiled as I felt unknown warmth in my heart, which itched a little.

“Tassa, the results are going to be announced soon, you have to go up now,” the backstage crew opened the door.

As the three of us held hands in a row, we were nervous as I could feel that my two competitors are shivering with nervousness. I was no exception.

“All of you have done extremely well. If I could, I would want all three of you to join us to walk on this musical career path, but I can only choose one. I shall announce the runner-up first,” Miss. Chut’s mood seemed to be in tandem with ours as her voice projected a little nervousness.

“Miss Sandra Wong!” Miss Chut smiled.

“Miss Sandra Wong would receive $50,000 cash, congratulations!” Sandra went to take her prize from Mr. Leow as the crowd cheered as Miss Chut announced.

“The winner would receive $100,000 cash and a 3 year contract with our record company, the winner goes to…..” Miss Chut tried her best to keep the suspense.

It was the longest pause ever as my eyes were wide open as her lips were about to pronounce the first syllable of the name.

“Tassa Songhrasri!” I nearly crumbled to the floor as the other singer held me up as she hugged me to congratulate me.

My supporters went wild as they shouted my name in unison as tears of joy flew out of my eyes uncontrollably. After all the long hours of hard work, I had finally succeeded. As I tried to wipe my tears with my fingers while collecting the trophy from Mr. Leow, I was speechless as I said a big thank you to him.

“I knew you were the one for us when I looked at you and your performance on the first night I saw you,” Mr. Leow beamed as he nodded his head approving his statement.

“I would like the winner to sing our newly composed song, my home, one more time, to wrap up this competition!” Miss Chut gave a thumbs-up as she looked at my direction.

As the lights blinded my vision momentarily and the clapping sounds droned into my ears, I closed my eyes momentarily to try to connect to the emotions and feelings of the song. When I felt the complete sync between my inner self and the song, it was just in time for me to start to stretch my vocals. As I sang, the rhythm from the musical instruments filled my mind with an output of the melody from my mouth. As I looked down from the stage to the audience, I could not see their faces clearly but I could feel their devoted attention towards me. As I pulled a high key near the conclusion of the song, the audience stood up and gave me a standing ovation. The initial low monotonous clapping sound slowly turned into a high-pitched loud and synchronous beat. My eyes scanned the audience and I spotted a lady who was the only one who held firmly on her seat. She was my mother. When I scrutinised every detail on her face, a tear came out of my face with momentarily jerks in its trajectory. When the song came to an end, I just stood staring at my mother’s direction. My recollection of the past seemed to fast forward very fast in the flash of light to the present.

As I finished singing “My home”, torrents of tears fell out of my eyes uncontrollably even though I mustered all my strength to hold them back. The audience clapped non-stop as they remained standing up and finally my mother feebly stood up and clapped.

“Thank you so much,” my voice quivered under the microphone which was shaky with my trembling right hand, in contrast with my firm grip on the trophy on my left, and a sense of achievement that I had secured a contract with the record company and a hundred thousand dollars cash reward for claiming the top position in this contest.

“This song is dedicated to my mother whom flew all the way from her hometown in Thailand to Singapore to see me perform and also my father whom passed away six months ago,” I spoke as I recalled the last moments that I spent with my father.

When I stepped out of the changing room, Keith was standing at a near distance as he looked at me.

“Congratulations, you have won the contest. You are going to be a big star, but I meant what I said from the bottom of my heart just now in the make-up room. I think I have fallen in love with you, not because you are pretty on the outside but because of your inner beauty. Such a beautiful lady like you is very rare. I have been holding back all these months about how I felt about you and I gathered my courage to tell you this right now, would you at least give me a chance for us to develop further?” Keith looked at me intensely, hoping for an answer that he wanted to hear.

What would Tassa tell Keith? Look out for the last and final part of the story soon!

I hope you all enjoyed reading!

Deceit [การหลอกลวง] (gaan Laawk Luaang) - Part 6

Hi everybody. I hope that all of you are enjoying yourselves over the Chinese New Year Holidays. In between visits, indulging in good food etc, I kinda have time to write part 6. After just 3 days, I managed to chisel and carve out part 6. I hope that you would like the story.

The story continues....


“No matter what choice you make, you have to come with me to the pub to meet somebody tonight. He might be able to change your life drastically for the better,” Mr. Thaphorn continued as his stern look set me aback for a while.

I had nothing to lose anyway, so I nodded my head in agreement.

“Meet Mr. Leow. Mr. Leow is the managing director of GMI Records, This beautiful lady here is Tassa. She is the singer that I have been talking to you about,” Mr. Thaphorn introduced both of us to each other as we shook hands.

As we talked, I learnt that Mr. Leow was scouting for talents in a privately held talent competition. The top singer chosen would be rewarded with a handsome cash reward and a contract to produce albums in his record company for this talent competition.

A woman who seemed to be in her 30s came over to our table.

“This is Miss Chut, she is the music director of the company. She would be here to listen to you perform on the stage. I hope that you can give us an excellent performance,” Mr. Leow gave me a smile as he felt confident about me.

My heart beat per minute increased a few notches as I went up to the stage. Unlike other performances, this performance would determine whether I would be chosen by the two directors. I quickly shut out my thoughts and suppressed the pressure inside me as I just went about to sing like every other night. As I stringently kept within my optimal zone, I sang my favourite songs and I enjoyed myself as I visualized myself to be my favourite singer, Marsha. Unknowingly I was making slick movements on my feet as I playfully danced with William. William in turn raised his guitar as he swung his guitar in a few directions. It was an unforgettable night as I enjoyed myself the most out of the many nights that I performed.

As I finished my songs, whistles and claps came from all directions. As I waved to the audience, I went down the stage and sat with the directors and Mr. Thaphorn.

“You are a superb performer and a very powerful singer. Your performance really blew me away. I have not seen such a world-class performance for a long time. Why didn’t we discover you earlier?” Mr. Leow’s words were so flattering that my face turned a little red.

“You would take part in the competition and I believe that you can do very well in it and stand a good chance to have a long working relationship with us,” Miss. Chut added in much to my delight.

“Thank you very much, no words can express how I feel right now,” I spoke as a tear came out of my eye.

As the car reached near his home, Mr. Thaphorn put his hand on my thigh in the car.

“I have filed for a divorce. After the necessary documents have been processed and when the time is right, I would marry you. I want you to be my wife,” Mr. Thaphorn’s words shocked me.

As Mr. Thaphorn led me into the room, he took out something from his pocket.
He opened the small square box as it revealed a big diamond ring. I put my hand on my mouth as I could not believe what I saw.

“This is your birthday present. Happy Birthday to you!” Mr. Thaphorn put the box gently in my palms as he kissed my forehead.

I felt overwhelmed and touched that he remembered my birthday and gave me such an expensive present.

“Forget about the past, alright? Let us start anew together.” Mr. Thaphorn’s words seemed not to reach to my ears as I was lost in my thoughts.

“Mr. Thaphorn, thank you for your present, but I would consider your proposal to marry me,” my thoughts were blurted out of my mouth.

Mr. Thaphorn smiled at me as he briefly left the room without a single word.

As I retired on the bed, I could not sleep. Although Mr. Thaphorn had deceived me to be his mistress and to stay with him, he wanted to make it up to me. Mr. Ng was very sweet and caring towards me but somehow, I did not have any lasting feelings with him. It was just at the spur of the moment that I did enjoy his company but feelings for him soon died down when we parted. As my thoughts meandered around my mind, I thought of Keith. It’s been a long time since I saw him. I would be deceiving myself if I were to say that I had no feelings for him at this moment. I still missed him and I had to admit that I thought of him every now and then. As I was playing with my mobile phone, I scrolled down the contact list to Keith’s name. I did not know why he never called me and vice versa. Recalling the past events that happened, I guessed it was too awkward for the both of us to talk to each other.

As I went to the premises for the competition, I was very eager. While preparing for the competition, I was advised on a lot of aspects of music from controls of vocals to that of image consultancy. It was an enriching experience as I mingled with other contestants and shared experiences.

It was quite tiring as I went through a few elimination rounds. Juggling between handling the competition and my work was very stressful, but it was the inner strength of my character that brought me through and my hard work paid off as I entered the finals.

“Congratulations to all who have made to the finals, the finals would be held on the stage in the open space. The venues and other details are stated in the booklet that I have passed to you. I would like to give a kind reminder that singing in a confined area and in the open space is very different. The finals of this competition held by our company would be advertised in the media and tickets would be sold. If you want to get any tickets on behalf of your family, friends etc, please do so by next week,” Miss Chut scanned our excited faces as she announced the details.

Mr. Thaphorn waited for me downstairs at the waiting area.

“Mr. Thaphorn, I made it to the finals!” I shouted joyously as I hugged him.

I told him about the details of the finals of the competition and it was 2 months away.

“Congratulations. If you win, you would leave me for the record company and I would definitely miss you as a singer in my pub,” Mr. Thaphorn’s excitement was nowhere near mine.

I smiled at him as I did not say a word, as we headed to the pub.

As I started my performance, I felt that I was more natural and I could be able to pull off higher notes in certain songs where I wasn’t able to. I felt especially ecstatic when I could make the audience sing along too as the crowd was dancing at their respective tables to some of the songs. William also did a little performance with his guitar as he tried to strum the guitar behind his shoulder.

“Hello everybody, I would like to make an announcement. I would be participating in the finals of the GMI Records singing competition. I hope that you would be able to support me by going to the competition to see me sing in there. You can ask for further details from the managers and waiters,” I tried to catch my breath after my performance.

As I went down the stage, I felt a nudge near my waist. I turned around and saw Mr. Ng.

“Congratulations! I hope you would win!” Mr. Ng hugged me to my surprise.

I returned the hug lightly as I broke away from the hug briefly.

“Can I ask you out for dinner some day? Like let say around six in the evening? I know you like Korean food. I know of a famous Korean restaurant in town. Then after dinner, I can send you to work,” Mr. Ng offered.

“Let me consider and I would tell you,” I did not want to decline the offer outright out of politeness.

As I went over to Mr. Thaphorn and his friends at the sofa seats, we were playing hand games and drank a lot along the way. One of his friends, Mr. Shinati, was a wealthy businessman who owns one of the largest rice exporting companies in Thailand. As our sofa seats were not so visible to the main crowd, Mr. Shinati was trying to take advantage of me at the dark corner.

“I know you are now available and you are not anybody’s mistress. Why don’t you spend a night with me, my sweet thing?” Mr. Shinati was sleek with his hand as his right hand slowly went up my thigh and inside my short skirt.

As I felt a tingling sensation, I felt like something was stuffed up the side of my g-string before I could stop him from doing it.

“It’s a small gesture from me, I hope you accept the offer and I would give you the same amount,” Mr. Shinati kissed my cheek as he whispered into my ear. His words seemed to tease my eardrums.

As I excused myself to the toilet, I went to take out what was inside. It was a one thousand dollar note. My eyes suddenly grew big as I could not believe my eyes. As I went back to the sofa seat, I saw Mr. Ng was looking at my direction as Mr. Shinati stood up and kissed me lightly on the lip as he hugged me and I reciprocated the hug and kissed him on the cheek.

“I got to go up to perform, I would come back for you, my dear,” my words seemed to tease him as his smile projected out his lust and desire for me.

As I was about to go up stage, Mr. Ng grabbed my hand and he seemed to be angry although he tried to conceal it.

“You all women from Thailand only want money. Is money all you think of? You all have no feelings and no regards for those whom really love you for the way you are,” Mr. Ng’s remarks shocked me as he seemed to be in a drunken stupor.

“I got to perform now. Let go of me,” I warned him.

“Rah-rah-ah-ah-ah-ah, Roma, Roma-ma, Gaga, ooh la la….” It was the perfect song for my mood as I sang Lady Gaga’s bad romance. I felt like I was exploding out my inner emotions as I sang it out partially angry and partially disappointed. As I sang, I winked at Mr. Shinati and I avoided any eye contact with Mr. Ng even though I knew that this song was his favourite.

As I ended my performance, I went back to accompany Mr. Shinati. He was not just any other customer but someone who could make me feel comfortable with him. As we joked and drank, we seemed to be old-time friends although I only saw him for the first time. As I stole glances at Mr. Ng, Mr. Ng seemed to be drinking non-stop as his face was glum.

“Mr. Thaphorn, Mr. Shinati is drunk. Maybe you and Mr. Khoo can help him to get home?” I was concerned as Mr. Shinati was slurring nonsense as he could not even hold the glass properly.

As the table was cleared, they left. I tried to avoid Mr. Ng but he approached me as I tried to leave the place.

“I am so sorry that I said such things to you, please don’t get offended. I really love you a lot. How can I make up to you?” Mr. Ng gripped my hand firmly and Mr. Ng’s face brightened up the instant I smiled at him as I did not want to create a scene in front of too many people.

“It’s alright. You are after all partially true, but we still have feelings and emotions too. I like you too,” his apology was accepted immediately but reluctantly.

“I have to go home now, I hope you sleep well and have a good night,” Mr. Ng felt disappointed that I had to leave that soon.

Time passed very fast as it was only six weeks before the actual competition were to start. As we were needed to practise our songs with the band, which would be performing on the competition itself, we had to carry out the rehearsals till the day before the competition.

“I am glad that you all are here, the band would arrive shortly and I would introduce you to the band,” Miss. Chut smiled at us as all of us were punctual for the appointment with the band.

As I saw the band come in, I could not help exclaiming, “I cannot believe you are in this band!”


Who did she see in the band? Find out more in the next part!
I hope you all enjoyed reading! Thankies!!

Deceit [การหลอกลวง] (gaan Laawk Luaang) - Part 5

Hi everybody. Although part 5 was supposed to be posted after the Chinese New Year Holidays, I have decided to finish part 5 and then take a good break for the New year before finishing part 6. I hope that you all would enjoy reading it and I would like to wish everybody again Happy holidays and a Happy Tiger New year!

The story unwraps.....

“You better tell me the truth what was going on!” Mr. Thaphorn’s voice boomed at my ears.

Mr. Thaphorn pointed at the phone. I realised that he had scanned through my phone and spotted some of the short messages that were sent between Mr. Ng and I.

“Tell me who Mr. Ng is?” Mr. Thaphorn demanded for an explanation.

“He is a regular customer in the pub. He spends a lot of money in the pub so I entertained him longer. Didn’t you teach me how to handle different types of customers? I have to be friendly to him so that he would keep coming,” my explanation seemed logical in Mr. Thaphorn’s ears.

“I don’t see you entertaining Mr. Chua or Mr. Tay and their friends that much. They are regulars in the pub who also spent decent amount of money. I did not see you being close to them as with Mr. Ng,” Mr. Thaphorn was obviously not convinced with my explanation.

“Fine, I have my own way to handle the customers ok? After all, your pub business is doing very well partially because of me. When I made a comeback after resting for 2 months, your business was much better. I am very tired, I need to sleep,” I did not care about how Mr. Thaphorn reacted to what I said as I turned my back against him and slept.

Mr. Thaphorn did not say a word as he went out of the room.

It was nine in the morning as the ringing tone of my phone shrilled the room. As I groggily tried to grope for my phone, I wondered who called me in the morning. There was no caller ID and I hesitated for a while before picking it up.

“Hello Tassa, your father is in the hospital, he is in critical condition. Is there any way for you to come back here to see him? He needs to see you urgently!” my mother’s voice spoke immediately when I picked up the phone before I could even say a hello.

I immediately woke up from my semi-stupor as I expressed my worry over the phone.

“I would be there as soon as I can. Tell father I would be there as soon as I can,” all I wanted was to fly back home as soon as I can, not caring about anything else.

As I rushed to locate Mr. Thaphorn, he was up and about at the study room.

“Mr Thaphorn, can I go back to my home town? My father is critically ill. I need to see him, please,” I pleaded, hoping to get a positive answer.

Mr. Thaphorn seemed nonchalant. He shook his head without even giving a reason.

“I really need to see my father, he might pass away anytime. Please, I beg you,” I knelt down in front of him as I cried pitifully.

The silence seemed long as I was anticipating an answer.

“I give you three days to come back,” Mr. Thaphorn’s answer came as a sign of relief.

I managed to book the earliest flight in the late afternoon, as it felt like eternity before I could see my father.

“Papa, what happened to you?” I dashed into the ward as I literally ran into the hospital and into the ward that he was in.

“I am ok, I miss you so much, I have not seen you for nearly 4 months,” his voice was feeble as his coughs interrupted his words.

Arthit and my mother were by his bedside as I rushed over to hug my mother.

“I miss you so much, my dear daughter. You looked tired. You must be stressed by work,” her words were punctuated by her pats on my back as a tear trickled down her tear.

I learnt that my father had developed liver cancer and he did not realise that he had developed it until at the last stages.

“Why didn’t you tell me that he was suffering all these while? You knew that he was ill when you wrote the letter to me,” my premonitions were confirmed true as I recalled the letter that my mother wrote to me.

“I did not want you to worry as I want you to concentrate on your work. I heard from Arthit that you are very busy working in Singapore and so I did not want to distract you. It was our idea to keep you in the dark,” my mother’s explanation brought tears to my face.

“My precious daughter, I got something very important to tell you, come here,” my father beckoned.

He took out from his wallet a few slips of paper. It was remittance slips stating the amounts of money which were actually meant for Mr. Thaphorn.

“The villagers were very kind. They lend to us quite a sum of money and I returned a small amount to Mr. Thaphorn. That was 4 months ago. When you sent over some money about two months ago, we managed to clear the debts with Mr. Thaphorn once and for all. Mr. Thaphorn was very kind. He waived all the interest that I owed him for the four months. I am grateful that he helped our family when we were down and out back then,” he indicated with his finger the dates and the amount in the slips.

As I stared at the slips, I could not believe what I was seeing. Just three nights ago, when I was doing my duty as Mr. Thaphorn’s mistress, he told me that I had only three months more as his mistress, before I can be free to make my choice. Little did I realise that the debt was cleared two months ago. My parents only knew that I worked for Mr. Thaphorn as a singer in his pub, and not being his mistress to clear my father’s debts.

“Papa, excuse me for a while,” my tears uncontrollably came down in torrents.

As I sat at the corner of the hospital premises, I felt very foolish and stupid. I should have checked with my father about his debts with Mr. Thaphorn. I felt worse than a prostitute, letting Mr. Thaphorn satisfy his lust and desires as and when he likes and not even paid for. As I looked down from the third floor of the hospital building, I felt very shameful for I could not face my parents anymore. What if they found out that I was Mr. Thaphorn’s mistress? My parents would never forgive me.

“Are you alright?” a voice distracted me. It was Arthit’s.

I nodded my head as I tried to avoid eye contact. I looked horrible with my swollen eyes as I turned away from him.

“I know you are upset about your father’s illness. But you need to be strong now. I don’t think you want your father to see you in this state. You don’t want him to worry about you at this point of time, am I right?” Arthit grabbed my hand and put his arm round my shoulder to comfort me.

As Arthit was about to lead me into the ward, my mother came out of the ward screaming, “Get a doctor quickly! Your father is not breathing!”

As a doctor came quickly with a few nurses, we were told to wait outside the ward. Time seemed to tick very slow as I was very anxious, praying that the worst would not happen.

“I am sorry, we have done our best,” the doctor came out as he shook his head.

My mother slumped on the floor as she fainted, not being able to take the news. Arthit and I helped her to the chair. As I felt dizzy, I sat on the chair beside my mother to rest as Arthit asked a doctor to help my mother to rest in a ward.

Three days had passed very fast as I prepared for my father’s funeral. I recalled the times when my father used to come home every evening with lots of food, and we would sit down to have our meals together without fail. When my father lost his job, I had no choice but to help my family to make ends meet by singing in my mid-teens. Now at the age of twenty-five, I felt a sense of achievement that I could be able to give my family a much better life by working in Singapore but my father was not able to live long enough to enjoy my fruits of labour.

“Tassa, its been four days since you have last called back, what happened?” Mr. Thaphorn’s concerned voice hardly moved me.

“My father had just passed away and if its not for my father, I wouldn’t have known that you cheated me all along!” my sadness turned into anger.

“Tassa, what do you mean?” Mr. Thaphorn feigned ignorance and it seemed to be obvious even though I only could hear his voice.

“My father had already settled the debts long ago, but yet you bluffed me that my father had not settled my debts and continued to make me your mistress even though my father had finished paying the debts off, you are in despicable,” I hissed at him as I tried to find whatever vocabulary I could to scold him.

“Don’t forget the contract that you had signed. You would not get a single cent if you cannot complete your remaining 3 months or so in this pub, I give you three more days to come back to Singapore. If I do not see you, I would take it as you are not interested to work for me anymore,” Mr. Thaphorn avoided the topic on the debt issue as he seemed to have planned everything before hand when I was away.

Most of the money that I had remitted was already used to pay off the debts, my father’s hospital bills and other miscellaneous things. I had to negotiate with Mr. Thaphorn. I decided that I must fly back to Singapore to have a good talk with him. I knew I had to work something out fast as the money left in my hometown would be finished soon.

“You have arrived sooner than I expected,” Mr. Thaphorn’s nonchalant tone some how irritated me.

“My father has cleared the debts two months ago. I should not be your mistress anymore. I would just be your singer working in your pub and that’s all. There should be nothing else that I should be doing for you,” I came prepared with what I wanted to tell him.

“I knew that your father had cleared what ever he owed to me back then. If I told you back then, would you still be with me? You are my favourite singer, and I really like you a lot. I want you to be by my side for as long as I can,” Mr. Thaphorn tried to cajole me as I folded my arms unconvinced.

“I want money,” I claimed as I stared at him.

“Well, of course I know you need money. You satisfied me very well not only in bed but also as a companion. I would be fair to you, here is three thousand dollars,” Mr. Thaphorn was cool-headed as he took out the money and put on the table.

“I was your mistress for the past 4 months or so is to pay off my father’s debt, but my father had already returned all of what he owed you. You don’t get it, do you? You were deceiving me all these. How do you expect me to believe you again?” Out of a blind rage, I took the money and threw at him.

“Fine but you do not really have a choice right now. You do not have much money left and you have 3 more months before your contract ends and then you would receive your salary. Judging from your performance and if you are consistent for the next 3 months, you should get at least another thirty thousand dollars. If you don’t believe me, you can go back home and earn your meager wages as a singer in your hometown. Even if you travel to Bangkok, you would not earn as much as that of in here. It’s your choice,” Mr. Thaphorn persuasion seemed logical as my anger subsided as I slowly thought through.

“No matter what choice you make, you have to come with me to the pub to meet somebody tonight. He might be able to change your life drastically for the better,” Mr. Thaphorn continued as his stern look set me aback for a while.

Well, that's the end of part 5. What would Tassa do? who is this person whom can turn Tassa's life around? Find out in part 6. Till then, hope you all have enjoyed reading it.

Deceit [การหลอกลวง] (gaan Laawk Luaang) - Part 4

Hi everybody, its me again with part 4! Last night, when I was writing this part, I fell asleep and woke up at around 4.30 in the morning today! I tried to sleep but I couldn't so I decided to finish this part and after 2 hours later, I managed to finish this part. One of my readers was wondering whether how many parts are there in this story? Well, maybe part 5 or 6 or even 7 perhaps? I would not want to say which part is the last part and you all would know it when I end it. Till then, enjoy reading the story and one note to Mr. Ng. You are very lucky, now you are getting more involved. Haha.

The story develops on.........


As the distance between our lips was a hairline away, Mr. Ng turned away. I was quite surprised at his reaction. Under the moonlight, I could see Mr. Ng’s face was a bit red. I did not know what to say as I did not want to interrupt the golden silence so fast.

“It’s just too fast, I just feel a bit shy because I do not want to give you the impression that I want to flirt around and just make use of you for tonight. After missing you for 2 months, I have been thinking about you. It was not just about your performance but also you as a person. I want to know you more. I want to know about your life from the past to the present, what you do everyday and so on. Can I?” his tone sounded very solemn but sincere as he looked at me with a hope of a positive answer.

I gave the sweetest smile I could give to him but I preferred to leave the question unanswered. I waved to him goodbye and stepped out of the car to go home. Although I had a good impression on him, I had my reservations as I did not want to get involved emotionally with a customer in my workplace.

On the next day as I woke up, I was greeted with a kiss by Mr. Thaphorn.

“Did you miss me, darling?” his smile came with a question.

“Yes, I do, my sweetheart,” I was surprised that I did not feel irked by my own answer.

“It’s from your mother, go read it,” Mr. Thaphorn passed me a letter.

As I eagerly opened it, I started reading it.

“Hi, my precious daughter. I was not able to contact you for the past few weeks so I decided to write a letter. We are still well and good. We have received the money that you have sent to us and we are able to live comfortably at this moment. I want you to work hard in Singapore and when you have finished your work in Singapore, I hope that you can come back home. I miss you…”

Although there was no indication that anything bad had happened, I had a premonition that something might have happened. I brushed aside those thoughts and felt that they were baseless. It was very difficult to contact my mother on the phone as the village had only one common phone and she had to walk a distance to reach to the phone. I decided to write a letter to reply back to my mother.

As I was writing, I was suddenly jolted backwards by a sudden force. I turned around and I saw an unfamiliar middle-aged woman. She was fair and her complexion is well-maintained at her age. Judging from her overall looks, she was definitely from my home country. Without saying a word, she gave me a tight slap on my face.
“You slut, you seduce my husband,” she pointed at Mr. Thaphorn who was behind her trying to pull her away from me. Her screams were shrill and so deafening that I had to cover my ears.

“My dear, she works for me, she was helping me in something….”Mr. Thaphorn rebuked.

“Help you in what? Satisfying your lust? Your desires?” Her fury was so scary that I froze with my hand on the part of my face that was slapped not knowing what to do.

Before Mr. Thaphorn could react, she went to the wardrobe and opened the door so fast that it could have flew off the wardrobe.

“What are all these? You are going to be in hot soup!” Mrs. Thaphorn threw my clothes out on the bed including my nightwear and my lingerie.

The momentary silence seemed very tense.

“I do not know what you do when you were away on long trips. You left me alone in here for months. You promised that if we came to Singapore, you would spend time with me, but instead you went to start your own business and expanded abroad. You hardly spend time with me. Don’t forget the capital for the business comes from me,” he tried to make up the words properly as his thoughts were impromptu and he tried to defend himself.

‘Fine, I leave. I give you one week before I leave for Hong Kong, to decide whether you want to be with this bitch,” she left with a huff as her last word on me gave me a stinging effect on my feelings.

I cried at the desk as I covered my face with my hands. I just wanted to find a man whom I can love whole-heartedly and vice versa, not being someone’s mistress. So what if Mr. Thaphorn treated me very well? I was after all his mistress, not his wife.

As Mr. Thaphorn put his arms around my waist, he tried to console me with his assuring hugs.

“Sorry, darling. I did not expect this to happen. I do not love this woman anymore. She has changed so much. If I could see her for more than 30 days a year, I am considered lucky. Only you can fill in this empty space in me right now,” his words seemed to be in a melodic tone as they soothed me a little.

I did not spoke a word as his hugs around me seemed to be the right prescription at that moment to heal not only the hurt I had received just now but also my emotional scars which were partially reopened by Mrs. Thaphorn’s slap and insults on me.

It was night time, as I started to go about my routine to perform. As the number of songs that I knew how to sing grew, I felt a sense of achievement as I could manage to sing all the songs that the customers requested me to sing. This was the only consolation on that day as my work distracted me totally from the forgettable moment that had happened earlier on that day.

“Hi. You still remember me?” a familiar voice rang from behind.

I turned around and saw Mr. Ng. I nodded my head.

“Can you sit down with me for a while?” Mr. Ng requested as his hand directed at the direction of the sofa seat.

“I would join you later, I have to entertain other customers,” I smiled briefly as I left hurriedly.

As I mingled with the customers and drank, my mood was very happy as I felt very high. The alcohol in me that could take away my worries for that night was the most I could ask for. As I drank more and more, a hand grabbed me as I was directed to a sofa seat.

“Are you alright?” a voice from an unknown direction seemed to be directed at me.

As I smiled at him, he gave me a glass of ice-water.

As I looked closer at him, I did not realise he was Mr. Ng.

“I like you a lot. Can I have your number?” Judging from his tone, he seemed sober.

“I like you too. Let me tell you my number,” as I spoke without thinking, I took his mobile phone and punched in my number in it.

“I got to perform now. I would come down later to find you,” I spoke hurriedly as I rushed up the stage.

As I was performing my final set of songs, I scanned through the audience and smiled at Mr. Ng as I sang. I felt as if I was floating on the stage as I recalled the moment when I was in the car with him. My feelings were synchronized to the lyrics as those feelings were projected out fully in the song. As I glanced at Mr. Ng, he smiled at me, as if knowing what I was thinking about in my head.

As I finished the song, I came down and sat beside Mr. Ng.

“I hoped you like the song,” I smiled at him as I served him a drink.
As the pub was closing, I took my bag preparing to go home when Mr. Ng led my hand near the exit to the direction of his car.

I was quite surprised by his reaction as he just led me to his car and he just drove off. I did not know how to react but I did not try to stop him. As he was driving, the golden silence made me increasingly awkward. I wanted to break this silence, but I did not know what to tell him.

“We have reached my place,” Mr. Ng finally spoken. I did not realise that he did not drive me back to my own home but to his home.

“Mr. Ng, I have to go home,” I felt abit worried as Mr. Thaphorn would be at home. It was getting late and I did not want Mr. Thaphorn to worry.

“Just follow me, I want to show you something,” Mr. Ng beckoned me as I stepped into the main gate of his semi-detached home.

It was dark and my eyes could only outline the silhouette of the garden landscape. As Mr. Ng switched on some of the lights which shone on the garden, my mouth literally dropped as I could not believe my eyes. Purple orchids were literally everywhere. Orchids were my favourite flower and purple was my favourite colour for this species of flower.

As Mr. Ng stood behind me, I stepped on the grass and looked at the purple orchids. It was a beautiful sight.

“I knew you liked orchids, so I planted them myself. I overheard that you said to a customer that you liked purple orchids before you disappeared for 2 months. I decided to plant purple orchids so that I could remember you,” a sense of achievement was clearly in his voice.

As these flowers brought tranquility in my heart, it was the first time that a man whom I barely knew would do so much for me. As I turned around to face Mr. Ng, I felt like tearing as I was moved by his effort. As a tear trickled down my eye, his left hand brushed my tear aside. My eyes seemed not able to escape his as he held my waist, not knowing what to do. Not afraid of being embarrassed, I hugged him tight as I kissed him on the lips. His lips on mine were at first frozen in mine but he soon reciprocated back with a rush of passion which penetrated inside me literally. As we kissed, it was unlike that of with Mr. Thaphorn. The passion was real and raw. It was that kiss that I realised that my feelings for Mr. Thaphorn were of pretence and he was just someone to fill up the empty space in my heart. As our kisses were deeper and wetter, I felt as if I had known this man for a long time.

The ringing of my phone interrupted our intimate moment. When I realised that it was Mr. Thaphorn who was calling me, I panicked. He must be very angry that I had not come back at this hour.

“Where have you been? I am worried sick about you!” Mr. Thaphorn’s voice was obviously audible to Mr. Ng in the quiet surroundings.

“I met an old friend and had supper. I am going back home now,” my impromptu response surprised even myself for coming up with a lie that quick.

Mr. Thaphorn put down the phone without saying a word. I knew that he must be not very pleased that I did not inform him beforehand.

“Sorry I have to go, my boss is waiting for me,” I apologized.

“Its ok, do you need a lift?” his offer was flatly declined.

“Its not convenient, if it’s alright to send me to the main road, I would take a taxi from there,” I felt disappointed that it had to end abruptly.

On my way home, I smiled to myself as the memories at his garden flooded my mind. Although there were regular customers who treated me very well, I felt that Mr. Ng was someone very special that made me want to know him more.

“Please do inform me where you are going next time ok?” Mr. Thaphorn’s reminder seemed to fall on deaf ears.

As I went to the room, I was unaware that Mr. Thaphorn was looking at me all these while.

“Could you excuse me? I need to change,” I glanced at him from the corner of my eye as I took out my bathrobe from the wardrobe.

“Are you seeing somebody? I see that you aren’t really paying attention to me these few days,” Mr. Thaphorn raised his voice a little.

“The slap from your wife still hurts me, what do you expect me to do?” I pretended as I put my hand on my right hand side of my face where she slapped, trying to feel pitiful.

“I know you suffered a lot, my dear, I shall leave you alone,” Mr. Thaphorn seemed convinced by my answer.

As I came out of the shower, Mr. Thaphorn was standing near the door as he tugged my bathrobe so hard that the fabric belt around my bathrobe loosened.

“You better tell me the truth what was going on!” Mr. Thaphorn’s voice boomed at my ears.


The end of part 4. What did Mr. Thaphorn find out? Find out more in part 5! Till then, I hope you enjoy this part of the story and if I have not released part 5 before the Year of the Tiger arrives, I would like to wish everybody a Happy Chinese New Year and Happy holidays!

Deceit [การหลอกลวง] (gaan Laawk Luaang) - Part 3

Hi everybody. I am back again with third part of the story. For those who missed the first and second part, you can go to the blog archive on the right and under January 2010, you can click on the first part to read or alternatively you can scroll down (might take quite long!) to part 1 and 2. Anyway this part is slightly longer due to a request from someone to include himself in the story. So instead of putting it in part 4, I included it in part 3. So you know who you are, you better read it.

The story continues....

“Arthit, why are you here? Oh my god, how did you find me here?” I felt delighted that I saw my childhood friend in Singapore.

“Your mother gave me your address in Singapore. I am here in Singapore for a short holiday and I decided to look for you,” Arthit’s voice was something I missed after not seeing him for two years.

“I managed to see your mother for a while when your father was not at home. Your mother was ill-treated by your father because she did not tell your father that you left home to come to Singapore. Your mother is in serious condition now and your father goes out to drink almost everyday,” his solemn tone made my heart drop.

“I wanted to help your parents but your mother insisted that I should not interfere in her family matters and she said the only way to help her is to tell you what is happening and pass me your address in Singapore,” he continued sometimes stopping to check whether I was alright.

My conversation with him was a long one before we had to end it as it was getting late.

“Mr. Lee, I have to go back home to see my parents,” my words spilled out the moment I saw Mr. Lee the next morning.

“Tassa, do you think you can leave anytime you want? You got lots of work to do. Don’t forget everything on you is sponsored by me. How can I let you go?” Mr. Lee uttered his words with a snicker.

“I heard my mother is in serious condition, I must go see her,” my emphasis seemed to have fallen on deaf ears.

“I said NO! N O. NO! Go back to your work!” Mr. Lee yelled at me for the first time.

“You said you want to establish my singing career, produce albums and such, but in the end you brought me here to be someone’s mistress…”my words were interrupted by a slap across the face by Mr. Lee

“You bitch, your father owe Mr. Thaphorn so much money. Do you know that if you didn’t choose to come to Singapore, you would not even see your father anymore to begin with? Don’t blame me, blame your father,” Mr. Lee turned around to face the window, a sign of wanting to ignore me.

I ran out of his office and to the studio crying. As I sat at a corner, Keith approached me.

“What do you want?” my defensive tone came with stammers due to my tears.

“Nothing, I just wanted to comfort you that’s all,” his casual tone seemed to be always the same, hiding his emotions if there were any.

I explained to him what had happened and about my past.

“Although I cannot truly understand how you feel, if you do need a listening ear, I would be there for you,” his casual tone seemed to be the same but yet I felt slightly better.

As I got busy with my work, Mr. Lee’s voice suddenly interrupted my concentration.

“Tassa, I did not mean to shout at you. I would want to establish your name slowly before we can go into recording and the release of your albums,” his apologetic tone hardly moved me as my blood started to boil the moment he spoke.

“Mr. Lee, tonight there is a performance. I need to be focused and prepare for this performance,” I tried to act professional even though my voice quaked a little.

As I went up the stage, the choice of songs I sang was in tandem with my angry and disappointed mood. Although my mood softened a little when I glanced at Keith, my mood returned to the same levels when Mr. Lee was sitting at the corner of the pub with Mr. Thaphorn.

After my performance, I tried to avoid Mr. Lee and Mr. Thaphorn and walked the other way. Mr. Lee approached me and grabbed my arm.

“Come with me,” Mr. Lee’s lips were near my ears.

As he drove me to the direction of the studio, my mind was muddled with question marks. I did not know what he was trying to do and that the rest of the crew had not packed their stuff.

“What is the hurry? Tell me.” my worried tone seemed not to reach to his ears.

As he grabbed me to his office, he pushed me towards the door and started to put his lips onto mine.

“Tassa, don’t resist. I want you!” his words were muffled as he attempted to kiss me.

I was in a state of shock when he did that.

“Tassa, I really like you from the start when I saw you, I told the rest of the crew to have supper before coming back. I want to spend some time with you together,” his words seemed to be like a metal pan which smacked me hard on the head.

“No….you can’t do that. Please stop what you are doing. I would tell Mr. Thaphorn about this,” my resistance seemed to be futile as his whole body was pressing against me. His hands locked my arms firmly on the door.

“I am jealous that you are Mr. Thaphorn’s mistress. Don’t forget that I was the one who found you, not him. I was the one who indirectly helped you, to get you a better life and you went to become his mistress and you never even showed a single bit of gratitude towards me,” his hissing was disgusting as his saliva sprayed all over my face.

As he attempted to kiss my lips, I managed to muster all my strength to release his grip on my right hand as I used every ounce of my energy to slap him across his face. His eyes were wide open with the surprise slap. He shook his head a little as he felt the area on his cheek that was slapped.

“If you don’t give in to me, your parents would not survive the next sun rise,” his threats were shocking and I could not believe my ears when he said that.

As I attempted to get out of the office, he twisted my arm and turned me around. The pain shot from my arm was too much as I screamed in pain.

As he covered my mouth and nose, I felt a bit faint and my resistance to him became weaker and weaker. As I collapsed onto the floor, I could only feel that my dress was literally torn away. I felt very filthy as I was groped and kissed everywhere. My sobs projected out my extreme pain and sorrow from within as the thoughts of being forced to give in to somebody meandered around my mind not being able to be gotten rid off so easily. As his hand was covering firmly on my mouth and nose, I struggled to breathe, not caring what he was doing to me but shortly I fainted.

As I woke up, my first reaction is to run away as I struggled to see where I was.

“Lie down! You are very safe now, you are in the hospital now,” I could not make out who he was until when he went closer towards me. The sight of Keith made me more relieved.

“Mr. Lee is not here. Don’t worry I realised you were missing when I was packing the staff and so I went back to the studio to check things out, then I saw Mr. Lee trying to take advantage of you. I was in the nick of time to prevent him from raping you.” Keith stopped as I covered my ears.

“Keith, thank you so much,” I finally spoken as I uncovered my ears.

As Keith left, the mental pain and torture was tremendous. Previously when I was in Thailand, I was disturbed often by the villagers, being given indecent remarks. It was nothing as compared to the incident which happened last night. In my thoughts, I just wanted to go home. If I was destined to live from hand to mouth, I would prefer it this way to being a toy for the rich.

Mr. Thaphorn came in shortly after Keith left. When I saw him, I did not know how to feel. To me, I was confused to whether he was good or bad. I did not care what he did, but I hoped that he could treat me well.

“Sorry about last night’s incident. I did not know that Mr. Lee did such a horrible thing to you. So far the police was not contacted about this incident. When Keith called me immediately after he found you, I told him to cover up for Mr. Lee. When the hospital asked why you are in this state, I told him what to tell to the staff in here. I explained to him why and I know he was very reluctant to accept the reason,” Mr. Thaphorn’s explanation seemed to be memorised before hand as his explanation was perfectly systematic.

“I know what you are thinking of. I would let you rest at my home for the time being and you shall not be under Mr. Lee anymore. You would work in a pub as a singer. I promise you that you would not see that bastard anymore. I have terminated my contract with him for his band to sing in my pub. Mr. Lee would give you a hefty compensation if you do not report him to the relevant authorities,” he continued, his statements did not bring about any consolation to me.

“I would think about it,” my whisper was hardly audible as I turned my head away.

“I understand,” Mr. Thaphorn put the cheque in my hand as he left.

As I looked at the cheque, I could not believe my eyes. It was not $5000, but it was $50,000. A note was clipped at the back.

It read, “Tassa, This is the amount to be paid to you for your work in my pub and on behalf of Mr. Lee, your compensation from him for the harm he caused to you. I truly regret such a thing had happened to make you like this. My heart aches when I see you in this state too. From Mr. Thaphorn.”

I did not want money to cloud my decision. But even if I were to successfully bring Mr. Lee to justice, it would not do me any good. I would not know who else to approach to work in here. If I go back to Thailand soon, I would never be able to achieve my aim to get my family out of poverty and I would be back to square one.

As I tossed and turn on the hard bed, I could not make up my mind. I tried to shut out the thoughts of that faithful night when Mr. Lee tried to take advantage of me. My tears flew out of my eyes uncontrollably as the thoughts managed to come into my mind although I tried to filter them out.

The next morning, Mr. Thaphorn came in to visit me. He smiled at me and announced,
“You can be discharged. Let’s go, let me send you to my home.”

As we headed to his home, I did not know how to show my gratitude towards Mr. Thaphorn. I did not want to think too much to whether he had an ulterior motive or not, but currently he was treating me very well.

“You go rest early ok? I would ask the maid to send up your dinner,” his voice seemed like a lullaby to make me sleep as he tucked me to sleep.

“About the cheque, I …” I hurriedly spoke before he left the room

“I would give you more time to think about it, you need not answer right now,” Mr. Thaphorn punctuated his sentence with the soft click of the doorknob as he closed the door behind him.

A month has past. Within this month, I had decided to accept the compensation. Mr. Thaphorn was very nice to me as he tried his best to help me recover from my mental scars. For nearly five weeks, I rested at his home not doing anything until I was too sick of doing nothing. I decided to start on my work again.

It was very different working with Mr. Thaphorn as I did not have the studio’s facility to practise my singing. I had to go to the pub in the early afternoon with the band employed in there to practise my singing without much professional advice. The advice from Mr. Lee’s vocal trainer still stuck in my head like superglue as I re-memorised the lyrics of the songs and tried to catch up with what I had lost for the past one month or so.

As I reappeared on the stage for the first time in two months, I felt a renewed confidence as I saw a lot of familiar faces smiling at me. Some waved at me and I acknowledged. As I sang my songs, I glanced at William, the guitarist, and smiled. Although William helped me quite a lot in getting me back on track, he still could not replace Keith. My set of songs was a far cry from the last time I sang as my songs projected happiness and joy. It was the most ecstatic moment after so long as I enjoyed singing and dancing along the tunes. I did not realize that time had passed so fast, and my performance had finished.

As I got down the stage, I decided to mingle with the customers. As I walked by the tables to leave the place, a hand grabbed my arm. As my eyes scanned his features, I found him familiar. Even though his eyes were small, it complemented his facial features. His fair smooth complexion and his neat wavy hair gave me a superficial good impression.

“Hi. My name is Mr. Ng,” he offered to shake my hand.

I shook his hand and smiled at him.

“You have disappeared for so long. Where have you been? I saw you regularly last time in here and after you disappeared for two weeks, I had decided not to come for a while. I heard from a friend that you would be coming in today and so I came today to see your performance,” Mr. Ng’s sincere tone gave me a reason to sit down with him.

“Thank you very much for supporting me,” I replied as I sat down on the sofa seat beside him.

As we spoke, we seemed to have a lot to talk in common. From the way he expressed himself, his confidence and his sincere made my level of good impression of him go down a notch or two below skin deep.

“Can I send you home?” his offer came as no surprise to me as I had numerous offers last time from strangers to send me home., but I rejected.

Knowing that Mr. Thaphorn went up to Malaysia for an urgent matter over the weekend, I accepted the offer willingly.

I felt very free when I sat in Mr. Ng’s Mercedes sports car. As he opened the top, I felt wave after wave of fresh crisp air blowing past my face. I did not realise that Mr. Ng’s left hand was on my thigh as I was enjoying the ride. Knowing that Mr. Ng’s hand was on my leg, I made pretence not to know as I continued to look away from him smiling.

“You can stop here,” I looked at him as his eyes seemed to look intensely at mine.

“I think your eyes are very beautiful, you are very beautiful. I like you,” I was quite startled when he spoke in Thai although his pronunciation was a bit off.

As I took a few seconds to figure out what he was trying to say, I smiled at him and I thanked him.

As he went closer towards me, I did not try to stop him. I did not know why. He was so romantic and eloquent with his words. He was charming and his sweet-talk stirred my emotions a little. As our lips were just a shy apart, I felt my heart pounding faster as the anticipation gave me a tingling feeling all over my body. My body shook a little as his hands rested gently on my bare shoulders. His hands were so soft and smooth to the touch on my shoulders that I felt that I could melt under his touch. As the distance between our lips were a hairline away, ……..


The end of part 3! Oops, someone might have gotten carried away. Look out for part 4 soon!
Till then, appreciate all readers for putting aside precious time to read the story. Till then, have a nice day!

Deceit [การหลอกลวง] (gaan Laawk Luaang) - Part 2

Hi everybody. I am back again with second part of the story. For those who missed the first part, you can go to the blog archive on the right and under January 2010, you can click on the first part to read or alternatively you can scroll down (might take quite long!) to part 1. Once again, I hope that you all would enjoy the continuation of the story. Koob Kun Mak Khrap! (Thank you very much!)
The main course of the story unfolds....

I closed my eyes and waited for something to happen.

“Your strap slipped out of your shoulder,” Keith interrupted the deafening silence as he pulled up the strap up to my shoulder.

When the silence resumed, my mood had a three hundred sixty degree change. I did not know that I was almost leaning onto him as Keith was almost grabbing hold of me to prevent me from falling off.

“Thanks,” this was the only word I said as my mouth could not mince my feelings into words.

I left hurriedly without a word, walking awkwardly without saying a goodbye.

“Good morning, Tassa. I hope you have a good night sleep last night,” Keith seemed casual with his tone.

I did not know how to reply him and I still felt embarrassed about last night’s incidence. I was lucky that only both of us were in the studio at that moment.

I nodded my head without even looking at him and went about being busy preparing to memorise the lyrics of some new songs.

As my attention was only on the songs, I could not help but recall last night’s incident. From Mr. Thaphorn’s offer to the close encounter with Keith, it seemed like there was so much happening on that day.

As we went to the same pub that I first performed, the mood was a total drastic change from the very first time I went there. Nevertheless, when I started performing, I had to put my distractions aside and perform my best. The effort to do my best seemed much tougher as I did not dare to look at Keith. Even though Keith deliberately moved nearer towards me while we were performing, I tried my best to avoid him discreetly.

As we went down to the stage and walked towards the store room, Keith grabbed my hand.

“Why are you avoiding me all these while after that night?” his voice seemed persistent for a very good answer.

I turned around and looked at him. I would be bluffing myself if I said I did not like him. I wanted to hug him and kissed him that night, but I was scared. I did not know what I was afraid of. I was not afraid of whether I would get rejected by him. I seriously did not know any other reason amidst my confused mind at that moment.

“Let me go,” my affirmative tone made Keith let go of my hand.

As I walked away from him, Mr. Thaphorn appeared in front of me from nowhere.

“So have you decided?” Mr. Thaphorn spoke in my familiar language.

“Yes. I have decided. I would be your mistress for 6 months and my father’s debts would be erased right?” my voice was deliberately loud as I replied back in English.

Mr. Thaphorn laughed cynically as he nodded his head.

Mr. Thaphorn put his hand over my waist as we walked down. My footsteps felt heavier each step I took. My heart seemed to bleed profusely but the only thing I felt was my tears been choked up to nose and could not reach to my eyes. I wanted to turn around to see Keith but I refrained.

As we went to Mr. Thaphorn’s bungalow, my heart dropped. I did not know what is like to be someone’s mistress. I did not want to be seen as a slut who breaks up marriages. I did not want to sleep with a man whom I would never love.

“Take a seat,” Mr. Thaphorn interrupted the silence unexpectedly as we walked towards the patio.

I awkwardly shifted myself to sit down beside him as I faced him. I would admit that his garden and the pond were very scenic. The landscape was well sculptured to suit his home.

“Back in Thailand six years ago, I have seen you perform for the first time on the beach. Among the other singers, you are very special. You sing with a hidden message to pass across to your listeners and your eyes, I must say cast a ‘spell’ on me. I like you a lot back then and hope to know you but I did not have to a chance to as my wife was with me,” his words seemed to punch me in the head as the past slowly unfolded in front of me like a carpet rolling out for me to walk on the carpeted walkway of nostalgia.

“When I came to Singapore two years ago, I opened this pub and I asked Mr. Lee who is now your manager to search for you. You shifted to another village very far away from where I saw you. Mr. Lee took more than one year to locate you and finally brought you to me,” his words seemed to force my tears out of my eyes.
I shook my head. Mr. Lee was bluffing me all these while. I was not going to develop any singing career in here. Mr. Lee must have known about all these all along. He just wanted to bring me to Mr. Thaphorn to be his mistress, that’s all. There was no singing career to be developed in here. I am not going to produce any records. So what if Mr. Lee is a director of the top recording firm in Singapore? It was just to cover his intentions. I could not believe he deceived me.

“My wife is always on overseas trips. She would be away for 2 months and be back for a few weeks before she would be away for another 3 months. I really liked you. Can you accompany me for 6 months? I really need you,” Mr. Thaphorn grabbed my hand. His words seemed to soothe me. Mr. Lee’s lies seemed to make Mr. Thaphorn not such a bad person. He lent money to my father but my father could not pay back. I knew that if Mr. Thaphorn did not lend money to my father, my whole family would have died of hunger long ago.

“My father begged me to lend him money and I knew that he was your father. I could not bear to see you suffer so..” I held up my hand to signal him to stop.

“Enough, I would be your mistress for the six months but it is because I want to repay my gratitude to you. I would not have a single drop of love for you and I don’t want you to sympathise me,” I affirmed as I looked at his eyes.

As he looked intensely into my eyes, he spoke softly, “You have your mother’s eyes, they are not just big and they are like your second mouth. They can talk and they are talking to me now.”

As his lips went closer towards me, I recalled the moment when I was with Keith in the studio. Although the intention was different, I needed someone to ‘hang’ on. As a young lady coming to a foreign country with hardly any friends, I felt very lonely and this man could fill my emptiness temporarily. Although at first I had a nasty impression of Mr. Thaphorn when he gave me the offer, I felt he was not bad after all.

As our lips touched and our lips caressed each other, he complimented with me so well, that I could not deny that I wanted more. The energy of his kissing did not make me feel that I was kissing someone twenty five years my senior. The passion ignited as our lips didn’t part as we groped in the dark to go through the main door and onto the sofa.

My mind was blank as passion overruled my logical thinking that I should not show any love or passion towards this man. As our lips parted each other, I breathed very hard. Mr. Thaphorn looked at my eyes intensely as his hands slowly came down from my cheeks, to my neck and down to my body. I shivered as he touched my sensitive areas. He understood me very well, how my feelings connected to my body. Although I felt a sense of artificial romance in the air, it seemed to be so real that I could not tell the difference. It was heavenly as his kisses and his touches ignited my senses everywhere. Being refrained for too long time, I could not help but release my inner emotions bit by bit.

The magical moment seemed to flash past as I did not realize that more and more of my bare flesh was revealed in front of him. Unknowingly, I could not feel that he had unbuttoned my blouse and unzipped my skirt as his smooth caresses and kisses distracted me from my conscious awareness. As I was down to just my underwear, my body was twisted seductively in front of him like a meretricious ornament. I felt the need to give in wholeheartedly to this man and not because I am his mistress.

“I hope my eyes aren’t just your favourite part of me,” as I looked passionately in his eyes and removed the last bits of cloth on me in front of him. His eyes slowly shifted southwards from my eyes as he seemed to be in awe, stepping up my ego a notch or two.

As our bare bodies were in contact, it seemed to be a dream as I suddenly felt as if Keith was on top of me. I could not believe my eyes as my eyes seemed to be blurred with the immense pleasure and satisfaction that I was having.

As Keith groaned out loud, I shouted as I felt another level of highness. “Oh Keith. I love you..Oh,” I unknowingly whispered hoarsely.

“Tassa, who is Keith?” Mr Thaphorn’s words seemed to have gotten me out of my dreamy zone.

“Sorry Mr. Thaphorn, I didn’t mean to blurt it out,” I put my hands together and put them near my face to apologise.

“Its ok, my sweetheart. I can understand,” Mr Thaphorn handed me my clothes as he dressed up.

When Mr. Thaphorn reached my home, he kissed me goodbye and I went up to my home.

“I am trying to look for you all these while. I miss you so much,” a familiar voice from behind shook me up. I turned around and was surprised by his presence.


Wonder who is that mysterious person? Watch out for part 3!

Appreciate that you all spend some time to read the story. I hoped you enjoyed it!

Deceit [การหลอกลวง] (gaan Laawk Luaang) - Part 1

Hi everybody. I am back again with another story. This story is quite long and it would be broken down into a few parts. The protagonist in this story is a female singer from Thailand. Although it is not the first time that I am writing in the "shoes" of a woman, the nature of this story is very challenging unlike the previous few that I wrote. When I first wrote this story, I had to re-edit it twice and I hope that the first part of the story would make you all read the subsequent parts. Once again, thank you very much for spending time to read my story in advance. The story unfolds......

As the lights blinded my vision momentarily and the clapping sounds droned into my ears, I closed my eyes momentarily to try to connect to the emotions and feelings of the song. When I felt the complete sync between my inner self and the song, it was just in time for me to start to stretch my vocals. As I sang, the rhythm from the musical instruments filled my mind with an output of the melody from my mouth. As I looked down from the stage to the audience, I could not see their faces clearly but I could feel their devoted attention towards me. As I pulled a high key near the conclusion of the song, the audience stood up and gave me a standing ovation. The initial low monotonous clapping sound slowly turned into a high-pitched loud and synchronous beat. My eyes scanned the audience and I spotted a lady who was the only one who held firmly on her seat. She was my mother. When I scrutinised every detail on her face, a tear came out of my face with momentarily jerks in its trajectory. When the song came to an end, I just stood staring at my mother’s direction. My smile reflected against hers and with it attached the past…….

“Go back to your room!” my father shouted vehemently.

“But I just want to play with them,” my sobs were in between words as I felt a sharp pain on my arm as my tears dropped into my wounds inflicted by the rattan cane.

My words were punctuated with the slamming of the door as I sat down feebly on the bed not knowing what to do. I was very terrified and my mind went blank totally. My hunger seemed to be overshadowed by my sudden thoughts which poured into my mind now. Should I escape? Where can I escape? How do I do that?

The incessant tapping of the window panel interrupted my thoughts. I peered outside and saw an unfamiliar figure. As it was in the night, I couldn’t make out the features of this stranger clearly, but he seemed to be middle-aged.

“Hi. I have a good opportunity for you to sing and let you make a lot of money, but you must leave your country for Singapore. I can arrange that for you,” his whispers were hardly audible.

“Why must you do that?” I was cautious even though the opportunity seemed too good to be true.

“Your singing is so soulful and touching. You are a talented singer but you cannot make much money singing in these villages in here. After every performance, your father would take the money and leave little or none for you. Sometimes he would even ill-treat you by giving you little food,” his knowledge of me and my family astounded me.

“My father needed the money to cure my sick mother, he is under a lot of stress and he earns very little as a farmer too…,” my defence for my father seemed to fall on deaf ears.

The figure vanished into thin air and left me a note on the window panel.
I was torn between filial piety towards my parents and the desire to have a chance to make a name for myself. The constant scolding and ill-treatment of my father rattled my mind only to be soothed by the praises of this stranger. It was a gamble to believe this stranger and uproot myself and my family out of poverty. Thinking about my mother’s ill-health with barely enough money for treatment any week, my father’s brink of insanity to try to make sure that our very basic needs are met, his debts which were always increasing due to default of payments and my long hours of singing on the stage nearby for the villagers every day with little pay brought me closer to this big gamble, to make a change and difference in my life and more importantly the lives of my family.

“This is the only way to help your father,” my mum’s voice came from behind.

I was quite shocked as I thought my mum had fallen asleep.

“You heard everything?” I whispered, afraid of letting my father know.

“I didn’t exactly hear everything, but I understand you too well,” my mum’s voice quavered as she approached me and looked at the note.

“But I don’t want to leave you two to go to a far away place, I love you ma,” my reply was in between sobs and the salty tears dripped onto my mouth as I tasted them unwillingly.

“Your father would understand and he would always love you,” my mum’s last words to me rang in my ears as she left the room.


“Welcome to Singapore, we are here to nurture your singing,” a chirpy voice projected out towards me.

I was in awe when I saw the large studio with sophisticated equipment, something which I could only dream and fantasise back in my hometown in Thailand. I felt that I was entering a dream and I was determined to work hard to make my dream come true. The stranger, Mr. Lee, kept his promise to pave my path towards my dream to be a professional singer.

The long hours of training of vocals and such were difficult. On top of that, I had to learn a foreign language which was English. Even though I knew a little English, I have to learn a lot of new words everyday. Although I can take the hardship, it was the difficulty of bringing my singing into a higher level that brought me to the brink of tears. Sometimes when I sang certain songs, the lyrics reminded me of my family. My secret escape to a faraway country would have upset deeply my father, but I prayed hard that I could soon be able to earn enough money to give myself and my family a much better life.

“Wake up! Its past midnight already,” a male voice droned into my ears as I did not realise that I fell asleep on the chair in the studio.
I woke up with a blurry vision at first, not being able to see clearly. As I rubbed my eyes, Mr. Lee was squatting down in front of me as he waved a packet of food in front of me.

“I guessed that you are hungry, so I bought something for you to eat,” his chirpy voice never failed to wake me up completely in a short period of time when I fell asleep at night during work.

As we ate at the table, I noticed that Mr. Lee was taking glimpses of me as I ate. Feeling abit uneasy, I turned and look at him and he smiled. I remembered the first time when I saw him outside my home, the dark image was a far cry to the person I was seeing right now. Maybe the perception at that point of time was in tandem to my mood. At that moment, I was happier and being able to see him in the light, I felt more comfortable with him.

As he sent me back home, I could see from the corner of my eye that he was looking at my direction whenever the car came to a stationary position. When he reached my home, he leaned over towards me and I turned to face him. I froze at that position as he came closer to me. As our faces intruded our respective intimate spaces, he raised his hand over my head and grabbed gently a strand of my hair just above my eyebrows. My heart pounded faster as I did not know how to react. He showed me his fingers.

“There was a small leaf on your head all these while, I did not notice it until just now,” he chuckled as he showed me the small leaf between his finger and thumb.

I gave a silly smile as my heart beat went down a notch or two.I gave a bigger smile to myself as I went home to carry on my beauty sleep.

________________________________________________________________________

“Hey Tassa, you dropped your earrings,” Keith tapped on my shoulder as he knelt down to pick it up.

I smiled as he looked awkward kneeling down with the guitar slung behind his back.

“Thank you very much,” I tilted my head a little and observed Keith closely.

All these while, when we were practising in the studio, I never noticed Keith. Gary who played the piano was a weirdo and the way he crept up to me at times when least expected gave me the shivers at times, but Keith is different. He was quiet, kept to himself and he took care of me at times. When I was thirsty or hungry, he would come in at the right time to give me what I wanted.

It was not long when we were given a chance to perform in a small pub, singing a mixture of songs alternating between English and the Thai languages was quite a challenge. Although the theme was consistent, performing in front of a group of fifty people in a pub was a different feeling to that singing in the villages in Thailand. Sometimes when Keith sang along in a few songs, the pressure of singing in front of so many unfamiliar people eased. In between songs, I took a quick glance at Keith. His smile seemed to offload my worries of not performing well on the stage as I did not want to disappoint Mr. Lee in my first public performance.

After the performance, a lot of them clapped and smiled at me. I felt a sense of achievement that I managed to cross the first hurdle. I heaved a sign of relief as I felt as if my breath was held for the entire performance and my lungs felt like exploding out.

As we went off the stage, Mr. Lee tapped on my shoulder and gave me a thumb up. “Please meet Mr. Thaphorn. He owns this place,” my face turned white as the movement of Mr. Lee’s mouth ceased.

“Nice to meet you, Tassa.” his eyes sparkled with a deeper meaning.

“Hi, Mr. Thaphorn. Nice to meet you too,” I lowered my head as I avoided eye contact.

As Mr. Lee and the others were in front, Mr Thaphorn purposely walked along with me. As he put his arm round my waist, his other hand subtly brushed the side of my right breast and I knew it was on purpose, but I did not want to offend him.

“Your father cannot pay off what he owes me till today,” Mr. Thaphorn spoke softly in Thai not wanting the rest to know.

“We are very poor. I am here to make money and once I made enough, I would return you back the money that my father owes you,” I rebutted back in Thai as I refrained from being too offensive.

“I got an offer for you. You can be my mistress for just 6 months. I would let you perform in here and during your off days, you can accompany me,” Mr. Thaphorn’s voice had a dash of sarcasm as he moved his hand up above my waist.

I was fuming mad, as my body seemed to be boiling from within.

“I would think about it,” my reply came in a no-nonsense tone.

As we went back to the studio, I went to a dark corner and cried. It seemed as if that the steam from within due to anger condensed into sadness and despair as my torrents of tears flew freely out of my cheeks.

“I heard bits of the conversation, I can understand a little of the Thai language,” Keith’s voice seemed to interrupt the flow of my tears.

I turned around as Keith wiped my tears delicately, I froze on the spot. As my mascara was mixed with my tears, I felt a little embarrassed and I looked quite a horrible sight. At that time of point, I felt vulnerable. As I got up, I did not realize that my right side of my spaghetti strap of my bareback mini dress slipped off. My gaze at Keith seemed to be blurred due to my tears as I unknowingly went closer towards him to have a clearer picture of him. As I went closer to him, I could feel his nose against mine and our lips were just a shy away from the imminent contact. His right hand felt my right arm as his left hand was put behind my back. I closed my eyes and…….


Caught ya! Part 1 has ended.
Well , wonder what Keith is going to do next? This is just the appetiser, the main course would be served to you soon! Once again, hoped you enjoyed my story. Thankie!!